So I’m sitting here having a discussion with myself, like I usually do about this time every night, and I got to wondering about something. Rock bottom. Where the feck is it? I couldn’t come up with a definitive answer for myself, which was kinda unusual for me. My choice of roads to take through life has put me in a rather advantageous position for knowing the answers to questions like this, right off the top of my head on a typical day. So I decided to research this shit a bit. I went to the old, tired, but relevant base of memes I have first:
But they were invalid- I knew it; that ain’t rock bottom, or even close. Even that guy pictured would not say that was rock bottom. It’s a relative thing, mostly. Much of society would agree on this being rock bottom:
And most days, I would agree. But are there lower bottoms to be found? I had once been able to talk to some guys who were on their way to that very destination, at Florence AZ years back. I was an outside trustee, my job at that time was raking the perimeter outside the fences. They would be brought out in white paper clothes and spend a few hours picking vegetables which were served in the convict chow hall. Anyway, there were at least 3 of the 9 or so guys that were actively fighting to get their appeals shot down, and fast tracked to the needle room. For them, rock bottom was no longer death, but life.
Because not only does this place change, from person to person, it also changes for the same person, from time to time. When you’re young and narrow minded, it’s easier to come up with difficult answers.
For this one, it’s usually some fate, some set of circumstances that are unfamiliar to you, and that scare the shit outta you. Death row, maybe. But as you get older, things start to dawn on you… On death row, you have the luxury of at least knowing there’s nothing you can do.. You can relax and accept your fate, if your mind will allow it, because what the hell else can you do?
It’s got nothing to do with location, or where you are at in age, per se. It is more a function of your horizons… closing in on you. Knowing… just knowing via experience and wisdom, that whatever action, or possible path you could divert your journey to, it has no real effect on those horizons. Once unlimited, and now closing the distance faster with every year, every month.
I think Dante Alighieri had it right. When the last of your life’s supply of hope has run out… take a look around you. Because regardless of how much of every other possible commodity you might possess, when the hope is used up- welcome to rock bottom.
Here it is.